This is it, the penultimate episode of Degeneration Q season 3. I have a long, meaty recap for you today but first, a couple of reminders:
If you want to catch up on all my recaps of this season, see: episode 1, episode 2, episode 3, episode 4 (Halloween), episode 5 (eugenics), episode 6 (the musical), episode 7, and episode 8 (Thanksgiving). Also I cannot say this sincerely enough—READ THE COMMENTS!! You are all so smart and funny! You notice things that go totally over my head and I appreciate it so much.
Remember season 2? I recapped that as well: episode 1, episode 2, episode 3, episode 4, episode 5, episode 6, episode 7, episode 8, episode 9, and the season finale
The name of this episode is “Quiet Before the Storm“ implying next week’s season finale will be a wild smackdown. The first few seconds are supposed to make us think Carrie is dead, but it’s actually a clip from a generic medical drama posing as Grey’s Anatomy. Carrie is actually alive and well. She’s at home watching TV with Butch Tina. Finley enters the room with green juice and nutritious breakfast for Carrie, who’s been instructed to eat well and exercise after her heart attack. Carrie spits out the tofu “eggs” in a really endearing way. I can totally see Finley going to a pressed juice place and buying some bland vegan fare—she’s worried about her lesbian mom!! But speaking of MY health and MY well-being, I hate that there’s one fat character on this entire franchise and her whole thing is being cartoonishly insecure and having a heart attack. I.HATE. IT!!!! SO MUCH!! Also, Misty is using sex to motivate Carrie to work out and while I think she’s more joking than serious…this show is so thoughtless, I don’t trust it to not be terrible.
Angie is feeling defeated and deflated after vandalizing her teacher/ex’s car. She’s too sad to leave her dorm so her spunky roommate, Bella, brings her fish cakes in bed. Angie wants to skip her creative writing class’s reading because Hendrix will be there, but Bella encourages her to go anyways. There’s a knock at the door — it’s Bette and Tina!! They’re like, “SURPRISE!! We would never miss your reading“ but didn’t they just miss Thanksgiving? They’re so horned for each other and Bette is acting weirdly serene. She tells Depressed Angie to shower, but in a chill way (“maybe just your pits and bits.“)
Tess, who we will remember has Resumed Drinking, is quietly getting dressed in jorts and a sparkly turtleneck. She appears to have hooked up with Shane last night and seems conflicted about it. Like Sophley, Shanetess is important representation for lesbians who break up and continue to have sex and date each other. Topless Shane suggests they go to couples therapy and Tess says she isn’t ready. A few episodes ago, they had a whole conversation where Tess was pushing therapy and Shane was hesitant. Nothing tracks in Gen Q and characters just do and say whatever from episode to episode, but perhaps this is more evidence that Tess is abandoning her coping methods in favor of self-destruction.
Next, Dre and Dani are hanging out in bed. Dani gets on Dre’s lap and Dre is like, “I love you.“ Dani responds by looking really, really anxious, so Dre backtracks and says, “I mean, I love what you’re doing.“ Yikes!!
It’s the season finale of the Al(i)ce show. Rachel Maddow is the guest of honor and for a few shining moments, I thought she would actually appear. No dice. She’s just mentioned by name a bunch. Anyways, Alice is showing Sophie photos of Piddles Jr., when it becomes apparent that a video of Alice yelling in the movie theater has gone viral with the hashtag #Alicesoentitled. The Darrel Brewer incident comes up—I guess people are calling Alice out about it, even though it happened 20 years ago. I didn’t actually remember this incident from the original series and had to consult the L Word wiki, but basically Alice went to a party and recorded a video of Darrel, a famous NFL player, with another man. When a different NFL player came out as gay, Darrel did hate speech, and Alice aired her video. This was when she was dating Tasha—an army dyke who provoked discussions of the Iraq War and the presidency of George W. Bush. I think this is foreshadowing the return of Tasha later in the episode, but this show is just such a miss when it comes to saying anything. I’m not sure a woke mob would care about a bigoted white dude getting outed in 2004 and especially not to the extent that Rachel Maddow cancels via text message to Sophie. A video of a celebrity freaking out in public after catching her girlfriend kissing another woman would go viral, but it would be funny, not cause for cancellation. This episode is more cohesive than most Gen Q episodes, but this mini-arc is so needlessly complicated when Alice could have simply tweeted something “accidentally” racist or spoke in an “Asian voice“ a la Alison Roman or had Bari Weiss on the show.
This next part makes zero sense. Sophie is begging Alice to apologize. Dani is called in to do damage control because she’s written hundreds of public apologies (her dad invented oxycontin, remember?). Dani and Sophie are acting like Alice has done genuine harm here—they chide her for using “the anti-gay f word“ and are extremely solemn about the whole thing. I think most queer zillennials would agree that it’s wrong to out someone, but Darrell is literally a gay-bashing white man with money, power, and privilege. Like, who is Alice even apologizing to? The people at the movie theater were merely inconvenienced and there’s a big difference between being messy and causing harm. It feels like Gen Q wanted to do a Karen subplot without actually talking about racism and the result is more nonsense. Ultimately, Alice decides to step back for the time being and Sophie begins to pull together a last-minute queer variety show.
Back at California University, Shane, Bette, Tina, and Bella are all in the audience of Angie’s creative writing reading. It seems obvious that Bella has feelings for Angie. She also says “whoa, hot aunt” when Shane shows up, which is funny. I talk a lot of shit, but this show has its moments!! While some kid reads bad poetry, Shane fills Bette and Tina in on her impending breakup with Tess. Bette starts talking about “relentless honesty“ and how it takes time to reestablish trust after infidelity. Tina is just nodding along and smiling. This is important representation of the most fucked lesbian couple you’ve ever met in your life giving relationship advice like they really know something you don’t. Meanwhile, Hendrix whisper-confronts Angie about his car getting broken into (“the window got smashed and it cost like $250 to replace“). He also calls her “immature” even though she’s literally 18 and missing such life experiences as: having a job, living somewhere other than her hometown, legally consuming alcohol, having sex with someone other than HIM, etc.
Next, Shane spots Hendrix onstage. She points him out to Bette and Tina as Angie’s ex. The adults force Bella to confirm that yes, Angie has been dating her professor. Tina is so furious, she stands up and yells “GET AWAY FROM MY DAUGHTER!” This is the worst possible way to handle this situation. Not only is Angie humiliated, it puts everyone on the defensive and ensures the university will get involved. This is not something Tina would do in any universe. Bette, by contrast, remains eerily calm. We also learn that Hendrix is 28. Ugh.
Later that night, at Dana’s Deux, Tess is drinking wine from her trusty Stanley cup when Shane shows up. Shane confesses that she never wanted another bar. It’s played as a big reveal when really, Shane was constantly telling Tess that she didn’t want to expand. She soft-pitches Tess on putting a hair salon in the space instead, which makes more sense from a business perspective. Shane says that she’s been missing doing hair and Tess freaks out and calls her selfish and a cheater. She throws a wine bottle at Shane and a song plays that’s like, “I am cold-blooded! I am cold-blooded!!“
Next, Angie finds Hendrix in his office. He says that he resigned with pressure from the department. He’s like, “Thank you, Angie, for giving me time to work on my book. Teaching was a distraction.” Does this clown understand that it takes like 3 years to publish a book, not counting time spent on submission, and $8000 (before agent fees and taxes) is considered a really good advance? Hendrix and book publishing can have each other. Angie is like, “so you don’t work here anymore?“ and puts the moves on him. This is the worst possible choice the writers could have made and they just went there. I’m struggling to express this in a succinct way, but it feels like Gen Q thinks it’s being so edgy and provocative because Angie is always the one pursuing Hendrix when really, abuse and power dynamics are a lot more complicated.
With Angie MIA, Bette and Tina hit up their favorite LA burger joint. They’re horny for fast food and each other, and Bette is freakishly calm despite the whole Angie situation. Tina asks her how come she’s not upset and Bette says it’s actually good that Angie is becoming her own person and making mistakes. She also says that watching Tina yell at Hendrix was super hot. Okay. It really seems like they don’t care about Angie anymore. Their only child was just humiliated in front of her friends and classmates, and they’re just taking a zen approach and talking to each other in sexy baby voices. They also get engaged. Bette pulls out a ring and Tina cries and asks for help putting it on! Poor Angie. Her moms have fully moved on.
Alice goes home and can’t find her kitten, Piddles the Younger. She starts searching her neighborhood and bargaining with a Higher Power (“karma shouldn’t hurt cats!“) when she hears Piddles meowing from the branches of a tree. She calls 911 and a fire truck arrives. One of the fire(wo)men is Alice’s ex, Tasha, and they immediately start sassing each other. If anyone can fix this show, it’s Captain Williams. Also, I love that they sneakily switched her from a police officer into a firewoman. Maybe she had an awakening and decided to become a real civil servant.
Next, a bunch of stuff happens. Bette and Tina watch fireworks, whilst Angie has sex with creepy Hendrix. Misty and Carrie sleep together for the first time. Carrie cries because she feels vulnerable and Misty promises she’s not going anywhere. This is such lazy writing. They’ve only been dating for a few weeks—Carrie needs to work through her abandonment issues without the crutch of a super nice lesbian who will never leave. In the next room, Finley Googles “LA apartments” because the sound of her moms fucking is too much.
The Alice show comes together without Alice. Sophie looks so happy and creatively fulfilled. Dre performs an original song and it’s actually really good! Dani is bopping along in the audience like a stage mom. Afterwards, they go home and Dre tells Dani that they need a more serious answer to their love confession.
And finally, Tess is alone at Dana’s. She’s very drunk and dancing on her own. Poor Tess, I’m so worried about her. This show is a freaking stress test. This episode took approximately 102 hours to recap and I’m exhausted. See you next week.
Other Things That Came Up for Me:
What exactly is a stress test and what happens if Carrie feels sick or weak?
I can’t think of someone less likely to buy candy in bulk at the duty-free shop that Bette Porter. Baffling character detail and now I’m imagining Bette walking through the airport with the meter-long novelty Toblerone.
This episode was so much easier to recap because the scenes lasted for more than 30 seconds and there was less camera shakiness.
“the anti-gay f word“ will haunt me until I die
Shane’s little belt chain!!
Not Dre writing a song in the morning and performing it with a band later that night.
Ok spot on spot on. One thing tho is that Darell—who she outed—is a Black man. So does change things a bit but just a note!! Love the recaps, hate this show.
Ugh the Carrie shit all bothered me so much like seriously we’re still doing this in the year twenty twenty three?
I agree nobody would probably care about Alice outing that guy, but I did think it was slightly hilarious to see her telling Sophie that she’s had it so much harder being gay than her, as a rich white queer who’s never had to be in the closet. I thought Alice was always out of touch on this fact - for example in the original show, I didn’t care she outed that guy, but I did care that it put Tasha’s livelihood at risk and she didn’t seem to think about the difference in her and Tasha’s lived experiences.
Also last week they said nobody says sexting but I thought everybody said that, but I don’t know anyone who says “the anti-gay f slur”?? Am I out of touch or is the show gaslighting me??